Alligatorpiss Recipes

SEX WITH AN ALLIGATOR

Steps:

• In a cocktail shaker full of ice, combine pineapple juice, melon liqueur, and coconut rum. Shake vigorously and strain into a rocks glass. Pour in the raspberry liqueur and let it sink to the bottom, then float the Jagermeister on top. If done correctly, you should have a brown layer on the top and bottom and green in the middle.

ALLIGATOR FINGERS

Steps:

• Place alligator meat in a medium bowl, and mix with vinegar, salt, and pepper. Cover, and refrigerate about 10 minutes.
• Pour oil into a large skillet to a depth of 1 inch, and heat over a medium-high flame.
• Add to a large resealable bag the flour, cornmeal, garlic powder, cayenne pepper, and black pepper. Squeeze off excess liquid from meat, and add one handful of meat to the resealable bag. Shake to coat. Remove meat, shake off excess flour, and set on a plate. Repeat with remaining meat.
• When oil is hot, place meat pieces into oil, being careful not to overcrowd. Fry until golden brown, about 3 minutes. Remove to paper towels, and serve hot.
• To prepare dipping sauce, mix together in a small bowl the mayonnaise, horseradish, brown mustard, and red wine vinegar.

ALLIGATOR BREAD

Steps:

• Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Line a baking sheet with parchment and spray with nonstick cooking spray.
• For the head: Cut off about a quarter (8 ounces) of the dough and form into a teardrop shape, pulling the narrower end out to form a long snout. Set aside.
• For the eyes and legs: Cut off another quarter (8 ounces) of the dough. Divide the rest of this piece of dough into 2 logs each about 9-inches-long. Lay the logs crosswise in the middle of the prepared baking sheet with about 3-inches in between.
• For the body and tail: Form an 11-inch-long log with the remaining dough (1 pound) with one end thicker than the other. Place the log on top of the legs (the dough for the legs should peek out from under the body). Pull the narrow end to a point and curve to the side to make a tail. Butt the head up against the thicker part of the body. Curve the legs forward slightly.
• Spray the alligator with cooking spray, cover with plastic wrap and let rise until puffed, about 30 to 45 minutes.
• Beat together the milk, egg and a pinch of salt in a small bowl. Brush the dough all over with the egg wash. Cut two small slits in the face on either side and press in dried cherries for eyes.
• With scissors, snip (without going all the way through) 4 small cuts in the front of the alligator's feet to make claws. Make 1-inch snips in horizontal rows all down the back of the alligator for scales. Press 2 toothpicks in the front of the snout (and leave them in during baking) to make the alligator's nostrils.
• Bake until the alligator has risen and is golden, 35 to 40 minutes. Remove to a cooling rack. Remove the toothpicks.
• While the alligator is still hot, use a serrated knife to slice open the head, crosswise, to make a mouth and gently pull it open. Insert slivered almonds in the top and bottom to make rows or jagged and crooked teeth. Insert a slivered almond in each nostril hole. Serve warm or at room temperature.

ALLIGATOR PIE

Steps:

• Pour milk and pudding mix into a large bowl. Whisk for 2 minutes. Stir in a few drops of green food coloring and a large spoonful of Cool Whip.
• Pour into a graham cracker crust (homemade or store bought). Chill or freeze, depending on what kind of pie you feel like.
• When you are ready to serve, gather your decorations and remove pie from fridge/freezer. (If frozen, you will need to let it thaw a few minutes before the decorations will stick.) Slice and decorate with chocolate chip eyes, peanut butter chip nostrils, and white chocolate chip teeth.
• Eat the alligator before he eats you!

ALLIGATOR PISS

Steps:

• Place all ingredients in a shaker glass with ice and shake.
• Strain into 4 shot glasses.
• Down the hatch.

ALLIGATOR PIE

Steps:

• Preheat oven to 425 F
• In a large pan, melt butter. Add onion, peppers, and celery, cook until veggies start to soften. Add garlic, meats, and seasonings, continue cooking until meat is browned. For a finer texture filling (as pictured), I transferred the mixture to my food processor and blitzed it a few times, but this is optional.
• Whisk together broth and corn starch until smooth. Add to pan, bring to a boil. Allow to cook until liquid becomes quite thick. Remove from heat, season with salt and pepper to taste.
• Divide dough into 2 parts - one slightly bigger than the other. Roll the bigger section out , use it to line a deep-dish pie pan* - carefully working it into the corners. Fill pie pan with alligator filling, spreading it into the bottom edge and mounding it in the center.
• Roll out the second part of dough, cover the pie filling. Crimp the edges as desired, poke a couple of slits in the top. If desired, roll any extra dough very thin, cut into shapes, and apply to the crust for decoration. Whisk together egg and water, brush over the entire top of pie.
• Whisk the egg together with water, use a pastry brush to coat the entire crust with a thin wash of this glaze. Cut thin strips of aluminum foil, gently wrap over the outside edge of the crust to protect it from burning.
• Bake for 30 minutes, remove foil, and continue baking for another 10 minutes, or until crust is golden brown. Serve hot!